The Ballad of the Islanders Bill and Ed

So two little islanders named Bill and Ed
were sitting on the beach of their island paradise
of Paka-Luku-Moca-Chino,
which is inhabited by a few hundred people
and these two people were all fighting about
some ideological differences,
One side is a socialist dictatorship
and the other is a rotating dictatorship
but you Americans and/or Soviets are too civilized for such behaviour
so let’s move on, shall we
So Bill says to Ed.
"Ed my good man, what do you think is beyond those islands over they’re?"
And Ed looks at Bill and says "Well I don’t know Bill."
And Bill says to Ed "Well shouldn’t we do something ‘bout it."
And Ed says to Bill "Like what," (pause)
And there was a pause.
And Bill says to Ed "Let’s build a boat and check it out."
Ed says "Get the wives of my back, let’s do it."

So over many moons and several ham and cheese sandwiches later
Bill and Ed worked hard on making a canoe to see what’s beyond those islands over yonder.
And they eventually were able to construct a fine canoe
using the finest in bamboo and coconut technology
The inhabitants of Paka-Luku-Moca-Chino were sad to see them go
Except for Ed’s second, third and fifth wives who never really liked him any ways.
So Bill and Ed went out onto the great blue ocean
Past the Islands over yonder, until there was nothing but open ocean.
So Bill and Ed just sat there for awhile, until they ran out of sandwiches
and the water was soon running out until they found a little island
granted that it was bigger then Paka-Luku-Moca-Chino, but it still wasn’t that large
But the size of it was soon lost on Bill and Ed on account of the intelligent life
At first they thought that they were all black and white and blue like they saw
But they learned that the inhabitants were just wearing body paint.
And Ed said to Bill "Bill, do you know what this means?,"
And Bill says to Ed "No Bill, but I liked them better with the body paint,".
And Ed says to Bill "There’s other forms of intelligent life elsewhere in the universe,"
And Bill says to Ed "I never really believed that we were that bright, myself,"

So after Bill and Ed met the other forms of intelligent life
They sailed of to the nearest island
Were they were instantly captured by Maori warriors
Know the Maoris didn’t really like Bill and Ed
Because they went and tried to force their capitalist ideals on them.
So they brought Bill and Ed to their Captain Joe
And Captain Joe asked Bill and Ed "Who are you guys?"
And Bill and Ed said they were from Paka-Luku-Moca-Chino
Captain Joe never heard of there home land, so they talked about it
and Captain Joe decided that they were harmless,
mainly because he thought they were complete idiots
So, he decided not to kill them. Which Bill and Ed were okay with.
Captain Joe brought Bill and Ed to his homeland of New Zealand
Were they ate Kiwi fruits and other such tropic delights
And Bill and Ed told them of their travels across the ocean
Which completely failed to impress the Maoris
Well, Bill and Ed fade thought they’d seen enough of the final frontier
So they packed up their Kiwi and Kangaroo sandwiches
and set a course home in the canoe, upgraded with advanced Maori technology

Well, Bill and Ed had been sailing for a day or two
and Bill had ran out of funny stories about his pet lizard
When they saw this great big ship inhabited by pasty white guys
Who wore an excessive amount of clothing
Bill and Ed tried to get there attention to say hi,
but the pasty white guys locked on phasers
and started shooting poor Bill and Ed
Well, Bill and Ed were able to escape with some passing Dolphins,
but there boat was trashed by the pasty white guys
So Bill and Ed were able to hitchhike back to their homeland
Were they were greeted by all
Except Ed’s second, third and fifth wives.
And Bill and Ed talked about what they saw on their odyssey
And about the dangerous white man, with their fancy phaser weapons
So they talked things over with their socialist neighbours
and they all sat around the camp fire for once
and they decided that it was best to get along
and everything was just peachy from then on.