The Record Show and Debunking Qua..er, I Mean People Who Have Diffrent Opinions About The Construction of the Pyramids then myself. (still think their

...heave ho theory is crazy)

Whoa, I ran out of room for a title. Anyway, there is a lot to file in now.
First, I went to a record show with my dad. It was very good and I got five new CD’s, most of them at five dollars. The following is a list of what I got.

• 2112, by Rush
• Are You Experienced?, by the Jimi Hendrix Experience
• Breakfast in America, by Supertramp
• Janis Joplin's Greatest Hits
• The Joshua Tree, by U2

I also got the chance to appear briefly on radio. While I was looking thru one of the places to buy CD’s a guy walked up to me with a microphone and started asking me questions. I am a little proud to be on radio, even if no one knows who I was.

I have gotten two major projects so far that I like. First, in Communications Technology I get to make a Flash Cartoon. For those of you who don’t know what a Flash cartoon is, I now who you are, it is a cartoon made using a computer and put on the Internet. I’ll have two of my favourite Flash Cartoons at the bottom of this blog.

The other one is in history. I basically have to argue that the pyramids were built by or with the assistance of a technologically advanced source. I am a believer in the fact the Ancients were visited by aliens. I’m glad that I got this assignment, because I don’t want to go up against it because I think it makes much more sense.

Well, that’s what happening with me. Here are some Flash Cartoons for your enjoyment.

8 bit D&D

All Your Pie

What I've been reading

Alright, first of I would like to tell everybody about the books I’ve been reading. You can read these books to if you want, but you’ll have to get your own copies.
First, I have discovered a new writer. His name is Avram Davidson, and apparently a lot of famous writers in the science fiction genre like him. I’ve never heard of him, but the two short stories in the collection I found are great. I especially like "The Golem," in which a Jewish couple meet an android. What I liked about this story is that the couple didn’t take this android very seriously, while the android was going on about his creation and how he plans on destroying humanity, the couple is going on about their daily life. Eventually the husband rewires the android and sets him to work mowing the lawn. I really liked this story for it’s quirkiness. I recommend Avram Davidson, but I understand finding any of his work will be hard.

Second, I have finished the sequel to Dan Simmons’ masterpiece of science fiction, Hyperion. This book, Fall of Hyperion, tells the continuation of the seven pilgrim’s journey and the fall of the Hegemony of Man and TechnoCore. This book has everything a good science-fiction novel needs. It has vast interstellar war, political intrigue, detailed worlds, interesting characters, weird religions, the second coming of Christ, everything. I recommend this whole series, I’m on the next book already. I’m only sorry that most of the original pilgrims are dead, what with it being over two hundred years in the future, but from what I hear that won’t keep Martin Silenus down.
On a related note, I understand that they (the Hollywood people) are going to try making Hyperion into a movie. I’m a little nervous about this, because I don’t see Hyperion as a movie. I’m curious about it though, wondering about who they would cast as who. If I was in charge of it I would make it as a miniseries, but I’d get Jack Black to play Martin Silenus, the poet, not because I imagine Martin Silenus as looking like Jack Black, but because I can easily see Jack Black playing Martin Silenus. You would have to read the book. I think I’ll make this into a post. Who I would cast as the characters in Hyperion.

Thirdly, I am reading The Crystal Shard, by R.A. Salvatore. I believe I have said that I am a fan of Drizzt Do’Urden and this book is a Drizzt novel. I wouldn’t say that he’s the star in this one, but he is a major character. I like the book so far, the characters are a little lacking so far, but keep in mind this is R.A. Salvatore’s first novel.
Also, I went to the Library today and picked up some novels that I plan to be reading soon.

• Only You Can Save Mankind, by Terry Pratchett
• Endymion, by Dan Simmons
• Castle of Days, by Gene Wolfe

Grade 11 has lost all novelty value

Okay, I’m probably going to be criticized for this because I went on about how bored I was, but I’m really hating school right now.
So, I had to do math, and I absolutely hate math. I believe that I have said this. Math is my least favourite subject. I’m more of an arts person. I prefer a good book, drawing pictures of fanciful characters, learning about some ancient civilization and come up with vast interplanetary empires and strange aliens. Math is just sitting around in a hot room, doing pointless calculations that I will only forget latter.

Anyway, I have a whole wack of math homework to do and I hate it. The only good thing is that I will be done math in over three months and if I can wait long enough I can get out of there and never have to see another arithmetic series in my life.

In my sister's defense...

I'd like to respond to my last post by saying that my sister Dilila is not always mean to me. She can be very civil with me but she always finds me annoying in someway. She does have this whole vibe about her that gives out a little hostility, but she can be pretty alright at some times. I just don't like it when she grabs my hair.

I'm so Lonely and Sad

I’m not feeling my best today, My little sister Sprite had a bunch of her friends over today and yesterday and my sister Dililla had here friends come over. This makes me sad because I don’t have any freinds who can come over.
Whats more, Dililla is very mean to me. She’s always grabbing onto my hair and yelling at me, she makes me feel very emotionlly damaged and sad. She hurts my feelings a lot.
Thats how I feel.

A new blog (for RPG's)

Hey. I’m probably the only person here who has actually played a Role Playing game, but I’m making a new blog about RPG’s. Check it out.

www.writerrpj.blogspot.com

Brian Mulroney's New Book

Haven’t done a blog in awhile. I figured I’d talk about the Brian Mulroney book that came out.
For all you Yanks out there, Brian Mulroney was the Prime during the eighties and late nineties. He is not considered the greatest Prime Minister in Canadian history. He was a real suck up to Ronald Reagan and was on TV once. I can’t remember why he was so unpopular and all. But he came out with a book.

This book is basically Brian Mulroney yaking on about he was the best Prime Minister Canada ever hade and that Canadians should damn-well stop complaining. He also disses all kinds of people, including Trudeau, who is considered one of Canada’s greatest leaders. He also goes on to claim that tearing down the Berlin Wall was his idea.
This incessant rambling, which I guess I do but we aren’t talking about that, reminds me of this guy called Marat, and a book written by some certain German dictator.

Marat was this guy who ran a Newspaper during the French Revolution. As you probably know, the French revolution is famous for being incredibly bloody. Marat was behind all this in some way always saying that the people of France should kill more things and that the Guillotine was the greatest thing that happened to France and saying who should be killed. He was basically the McCarthy of the French Revolution. What make’s things even worse was that he was lifted to a sort of sainthood by the Revolutionaries. I consider this pretty sick, because he was a really perverted dude.

The other thing this reminds me of (in pointless rambling, not content) was Hitler’s Mein Kampf. I have never read this book, or plan on even coming into Physical Contact with a copy. In it Hitler explains that there is a Jewish conspiracy that randomly decided to get money out of Germany. This is crazy that I can see no way for the Jewish people, people with no homeland at that time, to decide to get money out of Germany. Also, why just Germany. That is why I believe that Mein Kampf is a stupid book.

Thinking about the amount of junk that people can come up with by looking at these three guys in just plain stupid nattering from Brian Mulroney, and the warmongering of Marat, and Hitler’s racist ideals. This whole blog thing is kind of scarey. Think about it, anyone can get a blog. That includes people like Marat and Hitler. There they can complain about things all they want. Thankfully, we live in an age were any idiot with an Internet connection can have a blog, so the risk level of this is probubly less then in the pre-Internet age. Still, it is a risk that we live in.
Wow. I just wrote an essay. Sweet.

After a long period of contemplating the infinite and handling a turbulent sea of emotions it helps to read some P.G. Wodehouse

I was really troubled emotionally. What with me being a teenager who asks really big questions and a berserker who gets control on my body for three seconds whenever I get frustrated, which can be once every three minutes. So after talking about this stuff with my dad, I decided to read a short story by P.G. Wodehouse.

P.G.Wodehouse is a famous British humourist who is famous for writing these funny little stories about the British upperclass. I haven’t read much of his work except for some short stories about this guy called Bertie Wooster who is basically this lazy good-for-nothing who is a sure sign of Britain’s decline as a world power. The only reason that he’s still alive is that he had the luck to be born in the upper-class. Wooster also has a valet named Jeeves who’s job is to take care of Wooster, sort of like an Educational Assistant. Jeeves is everything Wooster is not and balances out Wooster’s parasitic relationship on the British Empire. Jeeve’s main job is getting Bertie and his freinds out of all these situations that they find themselves in.
(I actually don’t care much for Bertie’s life-style, just to tell you)

I first discovered this Wodehouse guy while reading a novella in the Otherland series. One of the worlds in the Otherland Network is based on his work. Jeeves hade a small cameo in the novella, but he wasn’t that important in the grand scheme of the plot. I was curious about this simulation world so I looked up P.G. Wodehouse and found he had some works in my local library. I found the stories mildly entertaining and I would like to see where I could find a copy of a few of these stories.

Anyway, I recommend his work. End Article.

For Steph: More Questions and Answers

I understand that things have been going a little hard for Steph, what with college and such so I did some more Q&A's. This may be a continuing thing. If readers have any funny questions to ask me please send them to naousshiva@gmail.com. They must have the following criteria.

1. Must not offend someone’s race, religion, nationality, gender or sexual orientation
2. Must be silly

And now, QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS.

Q: Your bow is not broken but you've run out of arrows. How can you fake being a bard?
A: Is this a D&D question? If so, I usually keep a few levels of bard because bard’s ROCK!!!!

Q: You can whistle and steam can whistle, so why do you sing in the shower?
A: Uh, I can’t whistle

Q: What's the most amount of sand you've ever had in your swimming trunks?
A: Who cares?

Q: Unlike a dog, how can a turtle ever be naked?
A: Wait, isn’t a turtle’s shell part of it’s body? I think it is. So therefore a turtle is naked and this question is invalid. And what in the nine levels of hell does a dog enter into this.

Q: You've just inherited a manufacturing plant that specializes in plastics. What are you going to make?
A: Who in there right mind would give me a manufacturing plant. I’m a writer for God’s sake. I don’t know a bloody thing about plastics and don’t want one.

Q: You laughed so hard you can't catch your breath. Stick out your tongue and show us what's funny:
A: BUNNIES!!!!!! Wait, there on my tongue, oh gross. (spit)

Q: If your whole body were a hot air balloon, would you stop eating spicy food?
A: Hm. I don’t want to be a hot air balloon. It doesn’t sound very pleasant.

Q: What kind of tape is best for creating a sculpture?
A: Not the transparent kind. Duct tape and that yellow kind sounds good.

Q: If you drive on a parkway why don't they make the whole plane out of that?
A: (pause) Um (another, longer pause) Could you repeat the question?

Q: If you drive on a parkway why don't they make the whole plane out of that?
A: (pause) because it’s stupid.

Q: You've written a hit musical! How will you avoid having fame go to your head?
A: Why would it go to my head? Why would I write a musical? I don’t think that I could write a musical. It doesn’t strike me as something I could do. That would probably keep the fame out of my head.

Q: Aren't papier mache cuts the worst?
A: Oh yes, almost as bad as the Comfy Chair. (Monty Python reference)

Q:Compose the lyrics to a new national anthem that features an animal sound at least once:
A: Steph, remind me to do this as a separate post - Writer.

Questions and Answers

You know those stupid questions that the blog asks you, well I’m doing a post about that in which I get all these stupid questions and answer them right here.

Q: Why does the taste of pennies remind you of losing a tooth?
A: I've never eaten pennies

Q: You've got to make contact with the alien leader. How will you tell when the conversation is finished?
A: When he/she/it has stopped talking, duh

Q: Radio wire is often used to make bird nests. What station do they listen to?
A: Depends on the species. Your average sparrow would listen to a mix station. Pigeons would listen to a more Urban theme. Robins would listen to Classic Rock. Parrots would listen to Talk Radio. Penguins would listen to smooth jazz and an Ostrich wouldn’t listen to radio. It would watch television.

Q: If there's no I in team, why is there meat?
A: To eat.

Q: The squish of mud between your toes; how would you live your life as a frog?
A: Use my own body as a power source to overthrow the human race.

Q: When you open your eyes underwater, do you ever worry that you'll drown?
A: I never open my eyes under water.

Q: Please describe how you could take the peel off an apple all in one go:
A: Ask the nearest dremer (K-PAXian) to do it for me

Q: What's the earliest you've gotten up to watch cartoons and what did you see?
A: Four in the morning. Women in bikinis. Gilligan’s Island. Chimpanzees reenacting major scenes from major movies.

Q: Why does the colour blue mean raspberry-flavored?
A: The colour blue doesn’t mean raspberry-flavored. The colour blue means truth, dignity and reliability.

Q:Well, maybe they don't need them, but don't you think that some fish might like a bicycle?
A: No (pause) No they wouldn’t

Q:If you were a pirate, how would you avoid laughing when saying "poop deck"?
A: Not be six

Q: If you drive on a parkway why don't they make the whole plane out of that?
A: Because it would fall out of the sky, that’s why

Q: Lionesses have no manes. How do they know when they've grown up?
A: How do you know when your grown up?

Q: What did you dream when you ate a spider while sleeping?
A: That Lloth, the evil Drow goddess was dead. Stupid fictional Spider Queen.

Q: You've been entered in a shadow puppet contest. What's your best pose?
A: SHADOW PUPPETS. I can do a bunny. Hehehe, bunny. Oh, heres Mr. Bunny, oh look here’s Mr Ducky. Uhoh, Mr Ducky is really Mr Wolf and Mr Wolf is hungry, oh. Oh God. MR. BUNNY!!! WHY COULDN’T HAVE BEEN ME?!!! OH DEAR GOD!!! WHY?!!!!!!
(long pause)
hehe, bunnies.

Q: You're going to the moon! What did you forget to pack?
A: Bugspray. FOR THE GIANT KILLER ANTS THAT LIVE THERE!!!!

Q: You have to dig a hole to China. Where do you start?
A: Don’t have to. I have access to the underground caverns and the inhabitants give me full access to the tunnels because I helped them defeat the Third Reich forces down there.

First Day of Grade 11

Schools back in session
Time for our lesson
-Principal Skinner, The Simpsons
Yes Skinner, School is back in session. And I for one couldn’t be happier. I have a routine and for once in my life I actually care about a good percent of my classes.
So today I went to school at eight, and I had an hour and a half of time to kill. To kill time I read Sojourn, the third book in the Dark Elf Trilogy and went to the Library to pick up a book. Usually your not allowed to sign out a book, but I happen to be good friends with the librarians so they let me get it out.
This was followed by me going to an assembly. I didn’t pay that much attention to it to tell you the truth. After that I went to Latin, then Communications, then lunch, then Math, then Ancient History. That was basically my day up until now.

I'm not going to stand for it

I was checking this Day in Alternate History this morning as I always do and I saw a comment. Naturally I checked and it turned out to be for a porn site. I find this disgusting and I’m not going to stand for it on my blog.

That means YOU.

New Orleans and the Heinlein Prophecies

Awhile ago it really sunk into me. New Orleans is gone. It is no more, it lives on only in the hearts of those who lived there. That sort of thing. Well, after learning this I was stunned. An entire city has been whipped out by the forces of nature.

One of my family friend brought up that this reminded her of Sodom and Gamora, in the Bible. This has been a story that bothers me. The basic premiss was that there was a guy called Lot, who lived with his wife and two kids in and around the Sodom-Gamora area. Now Sodom and Gamora were really party towns that had broken every sin that the Jewish people have. So one day these two guys came over to Lot’s house and said they needed room, so Lot lets him in. So at some other point that day some guys from Sodom and Gamora came over because they heard that there were some hot young guys over at Lots house. This is the part that bothers me, He tells them "Oh, don’t do that to these complete strangers. Here, rape my two daughters." Well, after that it turns out that these two guys were angels sent from God, patted him on the back, told him to get out of Sodom and Gamora as fast as humanly possible, Sodom and Gamora are nuked and Lot’s wife Rebecca is turned into a pillar of salt.

Mind, I’m not into other guys they way the natives of Sodom and Gamora were. I wouldn’t want it forced upon me, but Lot didn’t even bother to ask his guests if they were gay. Then he let’s his sends his daughters, who are probably sacred out of their wits and remained totally screwed by this events are at the hands of a bunch of rapists. The Old Testament has some messed up stuff in it. By this I mean no insult to the Jewish religion, I read in a book that there is always something messed up in every human religion.

Anyway, My point is what if all those fundamentalists in America go in for all this. New Orleans was the "Big Easy," much like Sodom and Gamora were back in the day, and both were smitten down, seemingly by God. I’ve seen stuff that seriously make me doubt America continuing as a democracy, and start a religious theocracy.

It kind of reminds me of the Robert A. Heinlein Future History. See at some point the United States as we know it will fall. The scary thing is, Robert Heinlein’s predictions have turned out to be more or less true.

The Decline of the United States of America

You probably all know about New Orleans being flooded, and all the stories about rapes and looting and desperate people doing stupid things. Well this got me thinking about the current state of the American civilization. My theory is that it ain’t got long to live. I’d say a century, maybe two if it’s lucky. This is of course if the American government keeps democracy. If you Yanks adopt a dictatorship or monarchy or something, you can probably keep going for a few more centuries at the most. This will be followed by a period of separation between the rich and poor and then the games over. This is also thinking that this American Caesar isn’t taken out by the British or Chinese or somebody.

Don’t get me wrong or anything. I’m not claiming to be an expert on this kind of stuff (what I like to call nationology), this is just what I think. My Mom says that New Orleans going into anarchy isn’t going to make the White House go into flames or anything, but it is a sort sign about the state of the USA. This makes me a little worried, because I live in Canada and that I can’t see America going down without taking most of Canada with it. I figure I’m going to have to move of the continent. I guess that I can move to Europe or New Zealand or something. I could build a fall out shelter or something, but I don’t think that I’m that kind of personality.

Well, what else is there to say. I went to visit one of my aunts. We went to A&W and a local book store. I got the last book in the Dark Elf Trilogy and a Dungeons and Dragons accessory book about playing Wizards and Sorcerers. Sorcerers are more of my favourite between the two because they seem more playable to me. That’s pretty much my day. Still waiting for school.