A letter to Kim Jong-Il

Dear Mr. Kim Jong-Il.

Hello. You don't know me, but I happen to hear your pretty keen on destroying western civilization. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a big fan of were we are going right now, but could you lean off the whole nuclear armeggedon thing? Nobody wants that. I don't know how you do things in Asia, but nuclear weapons just arn't cool. I realize you have a country to run, but maybe you should reconsider the whole concept of you know, killing everyone.

Besides, isn't it better for us to all get along? You seem to have a real difficulty with that. Maybe it's time for you to start being nicer to people. I know, America's being a really big jerk right know. There's been alot of name calling, what with you being called part of the Axis of Evil. And there's that new Behind Enemy Lines movie that uses thw whole Axis of Evil thing, but that's just propaganda. You know about propaganda right Mr. Jong-Il? Well, what I'm trying to say is maybe you should make the first move. Maybe send America a fruit basket. You'll find they arn't really bad people. There leader is just a dingbat.

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is please don't kill us. I know your angry, but I'm sure this is nothing we can't solve with a nice sit down. Call me.

Writer.