I'm an Urban Achiever!

Recently I put a link up to the Lebowski Podcast. For those of you who haven't looked at it yet it's under cool stuff. It's basically a pod cast a bunch of people do about the Big Lebowski. Anyway, the folks at the Lebowski podcast said they'd appreciate it if their listeners to link to their website so more people will know about it, so I did it. And then I got this.

Aspie Diaries -I noticed you've linked to us from your blog. Thanks for
helping us get the word out. I've added you to our list of friends on the
web site. You can find it here - http://lebowskipodcast.com/index.php/Links/Lebowski-Podcast-Friends/
.
The Dude Abides
Chalupa

So know the Lebowski Podcast people are linked to me. I thanked them and so know other Lebowski fans can come to my blog, even though I don't talk about the Big Lebowski that much.

I'm back from the cottage again and this time I'm posting!

Hey, sorry I didn't blog in awhile. This is turning out to be the August of Cottage Trips. No sooner do I get home from my relatives cottage then I go back there with my entire family, and I did have time to blog last time but I didn't because I am lazy. Just to warn you I'm going for another trip next week. I'm going with the cousins whole will have the highest chance of playing Dungeons and Dragons with me, which will be cool. I'd love to do the Mythania RPG, but I don't have that quite ironed out yet. Not to bad, I plan on doing lot's of new and exciting things with Forgotten Realms.
Anyway, the cottage trips were fun. I went tubing alot, and there is a good chance of me sending you pictures of myself tubing. I got two new books, one having a bunch of short stories by H.P. Lovecraft and the other having a bunch of Poetry by Lord Byron, despite the fact I believe I have more in common with Percy Brysse Shelley. Shelley is defenetly going to be the next poet I pick up. I also finished Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, which as recent readers would know I borrowed from my Uncle.
I didn't work alot on my novel, and it's starting to look like I won't be getting much of a chance to get it finished completely by the end of Summer. I do believe I am making progress on it, and at some point today I will get to work on it. I'm also getting alot of ideas about the whole Conspiracy-Urban Fantasy-Counter Culture megaseries. I'm thinking about calling it The Rosicrucian Cycle at the moment, as the secret society I concentrate most on is based somewhat on the Rosicrucians, and to The Invisibles as well. I'm thinking about working Grant Morrison in as a character, as I want to have historical characters appear in the novel. I feel that Ken Kesey should appear in the 1960's thing, which I'm calling The Fellowship something-something, depends on how many books are in it. I have a feeling it may be one of the longest in the megaseries. I thought I could do four books, but then it seemed like five, and then I had no idea what I was going to do. But combine that with the Apocalypse storyline and The Howlers (one trilogy and a few short stories) and probubly some kind of history of the organization before that, which I'm probubly going to put as an appendix in the Fellowship and Apocalypse books....Well, I've probubly given to much away. I'll stop talking about it.
Anyway, I'll try to call back in. Also, I'm putting 7 on the labels for this post, as I will do on every seventh day of the month because it's one of the special numbers. The same will be said for all other numbers envolved.

Important Update

Hey, I havn't been posting for awhile. And I failed to do my first 23 watch. Ah, well, I'll get to it next month.

Anyway, I'm going to my cousin's college tomorrow, or I'm going to there place tomorrow because it's easier for me to get there. It's kind of a long and complicated story. See my family is going to Ohio for a thing that dosn't really interest me, so I'm going to hang out at my relatives cottage where I will tube, watch Terry Gilliam and Quentin Tarantino movies, and work on my novel. It's looking like a good movie, even if Resevoir Dogs was already rented. Shame, since I was thinking about seeing it again. So basically you won't here anything from me until Tuesday at the most.

Well, that's about it for this update. Hope to see from you guys soon.

I'm getting a space bed

I didn't make a post on the 7th either. Again, I'm sorry. Don't expect a frowny face.
So, as for the title, I'm getting a new bed. One of those Tempurpedic beds that are good for your back. I'm having alot of back trouble, and my dad is telling me that I should be doing the stretches that I was suppose to be doing that will help strengthen my shoulders. Eitherway, the Tempurpedic bed is designed by NASA, hence the title.
I found a book of quotes on homosexuality, which are pretty cool. I like the one by Mabel Maney, who writes lesbian mystery novels "For a long time I thought I wanted to be a nun. Then I realized what I really wanted to be was a lesbian." I find this funny for some reason. I also liked "If God dislikes gays so much, how come he picked Michelangelo, a known homosexual, to paint the Sistine Chapel while assigning Anita [Bryant] to go on television and push orange juice?" Some guy named Mike Royko said that. According to the book he's a Chicago based journalist. I don't know who Anita Bryant is, but I think that's the point.
Okay, that's all I feel like writing at the moment. I'll get back to you on the 19th or sooner.

Christians that scare me

So I was reading an article in the Rolling Stone about this group of people called BattleCry. BattleCry is basically a right-wing Christian organization that wants to save teenagers such as myself from the evils of homosexuality, other cultures and stuff like that. I remembered coming to the library last week, looking through it and thinking this would be an interesting thing to look at in The Last Dance Revolution. The idea of making a Christian terrorist organization sounded like something I should do, and the idea of making BattleCry that christian organization sounded like a good idea.
This was before I even read the article. After I did read it, I believe that I may be all to likely.
BattleCry has a lot of violent imagery. The guy who runs it, Ron Luce, has a thing were they have a statue of a woman which they tear up. This is based on a biblical story where a guy tore up a concubine and sent the bits to the various tribes of Israel because he wanted to show them what would happen if they were ungodly. Scary enough, but Luce is saying that this is real. He believes that he is actually fighting a war. The sad thing is, is that he is using the same methods to destroy what he sees as evil as they are using, marketing schemes to get teenagers. It's freaking me out. Here's a link, I can't look at it right now because I'm at the library but the moment I get home I'm taking a look at it.
Ron Luce, if your reading this, you arn't getting me. I've read the article and I can tell you that I wouldn't touch you with a ten foot poll. I believe that you and your beliefs are wrong.

Back from the Desert

So, right now I am (supposed) to be working on my feature article that is due real soon. I've got around three pages done so far, I need at least 20. I'm thinking that I should call my mom in to give me a hand on it. It's driving me crazy, apparently because I need to get more work done on it. I could easily have done this a month ago if this was worth anything, but it's not. I don't care about this project. I just look at it and think, I don't really care about this project. When I look at the short story I have to write I think, this is worth something, but I look at this feature article and think, this is just me vomitting. I don't care about this in any way. There is nothing deep and moving about it for me. It's a glorified information piece is what it is. I feel like this is a complete and utter waste of my talents. Thinking about it makes me sick.

Okay, I got that rant out of the way. So, know for the interesting story. You guys have to here this...

WRITER'S FUNNY STORY THAT REALLY HAPPENED!

Okay, It's 2 in the morning and I'm sleeping in bed, all very peaceful like. I'm beginning to feel something on me. I figure it's the fan, because I always sleep with a fan on, but then I realize it's furry when it brushes up agains my face. So I instantly wake up and it's my little sister's hamster, that has gotten out of it's cage in the attic and has crawled into my room and into my bed. Naturally I panic because I hate that hamster. I believe it's plotting against me and this incident only increases that belief. So I run out of my room and there's a big commotion. The hamster goes back in it's cage and I am now securing my door more.

There, I hope you enjoyed that. I wasn't when it was happening.
So, this blog has been long in the making. I've been working on it on and off for a few days now. At the moment I'm working the final touches at the library.
On the subject of my novel, I'm starting to wonder about the construction. Recently, I've been getting alot of ideas for scenes. For instance, I watched Resevoir Dogs last night and I had this picture of Helen with one of the guys who went Marquis De Sade on her during the early times of her life. For those of you who have seen the movie, yes it is a rip from the scene were Mr. Blonde cuts of the cops ear to "Stuck in the Middle with you." Helen however, having seane the movie opens it like this.
"Are you familiar with the works of Quentin Tarantino? Late Pre-Contact film maker, known for making very violent films. Didn't care much for the language, but the dialouge was pretty good once you got passed it. Well, apparently he would steal scenes from other movies and put them into his. I wouldn't know any of them mind you. You wouldn't mind if I put some tunes on would you?" Helen puts in some burned CD or something and "Stuck in the Middle with you," begins playing. She mimicks the little dance Mr. Blonde did, every once in awhile asking guy she's about to painfully torchure. "Guess what movie this is from?" She does this until she cuts his ear off, thens he says "Sorry, you are out of time. The answer was, Reservoir Dogs, starring Harvey Keitel, Tim Roth, Michael Madson, Chris Penn, Steve Buscemi and Lawrence Tierney. Directed by Quentin Tarantino." I can just really imagine Helen doing something like this.
Okay, that's all I can think of. Just wanted to add that I am doing fine.

Looking forward to March Break. March Break will have nothing to do with this post.

So, I'm working in a co-op as part of my school. The workplace in question is a local museaum with a bunch of pioneer and Victorian stuff. Basically, I entered in a bunch of stuff onto a computer database. Yesterday I did doilies and tablecloths. It's kind of boring, but they give me a lot of free time. My parents are giving me a hard time about it by asking me stupid questions like how many artifacts I put into the database per day, which I don't pay attention to. I suppose I shouldn't complain, because they're giving me a lift until the weather becomes more tollerable.
Speaking of the weather, it's hell outside. The sidewalks are covered with ice and the town council isn't doing a thing about it. I nearly tripped on my way to the library today, (which is were I am now). It's annoting, That and snow is going down everywhere. I think it may be having an effect on my emotions, as I have been feeling kind of depressed lately. I'd like to take a vacation to a nice tropical place, that would be great.
The novel is coming along slowly. I can't seem to get it just the way I want. At the moment I'm concentrating on the first bit were Naos and Helen are trying to make a new life for themselves in the Desert, but don't do it because they have to complete the rest of the novel. Along with this I plan on writing in the first year or so of Naos and Helen's relationship. Helen is beginning to take on some Aspergers traits as I write this. I have this one seane where Naos gives Helen some flowers, and Helen just thinks "What are these for?" I suppose it's only write for Helen to have social difficulties, as she wasn't intended to have anything like a real social life by her creators, so I imagine she should have some similarities to Aspergers Syndrome.
Anyway, I heard a thing on Neil Gaiman's blog about a library that came under attack by the Religious Right, because there children were watching internet porn on the library internet. Naturally, this lead to the American Inquistion searching the library and finding all kinds of stuff on safe-sex and homosexuality. Naturally, the Religious Right wanted the Library shut down. I think the Library is shut down, but there are several problems here. Number One, I hate the Religious Right. I believe that you guys are going to kill us all and I seriously believe that if Jesus was to come down from heaven on his holy-Harley (refrence to my mythology, Jesus is a biker in it), the Religios Right would be the first people he'd complain about. Number Two, there your kids. If don't want them to watch internet porn then watch them, or at least not get so worked up about them. Was it not Khalil Gibran who said "You can give them your love but not there thoughts, they have there own thoughts." I'm pretty sure he said something to that effect. I know that porn isn't the best thing to be into, but you can't control people's thoughts. Number Three, and this has nothing about the library, this is just part of my tirade against the Religious Right, which is all this paragraph is really, me bitching about the religious right. Keep religion out of your politics. Jesus dosn't support any wars, especially not a war that is all about greed and prestige. If I had anything to say about it, you'd all go to hell for that, and I don't even believe in that kind of afterlife. I would create hell just for you guys to suffer in. Not sure what I'd do, probubly make you lisean to hippie music for all eternity. However, I cannot do this, because A) I'm not God (no matter how good a God I would make) and B) If I was God, then I'd have to love all my creations equally I'd probubly just send a bunch of Prophets or something among you which you would eventually kill.
Kay, I have nineteen minutes to look at stuff on this internet computer. Don't worry, it won't be porn.

Grand Canyon Creation Theories, or why my religion kicks everyone else's religion's buts

You guys are going to love this. Turns out that the Grand Canyon isn't allowed to have books about how the canyon naturally formed over millions of years, BUT it is allowed to have books about how the Grand Canyon was formed during Noah's flood. Oh, this is going to be fun. Do you know what time it is kiddies?

The Voices of a thousand happy children: MASS CONCERVATIVE CONSPIRACY THEORY TIME!

That's right kiddies. Isn't this priceless, isn't it? I mean this is just a juicy excuse to beat up on the Religious Right. So what's the major complaint here? Well, it could be that they are only selling one thing theory. The people at the grand canyon should be having a whole bunch of theories, not just one (which is probubly wrong anyway).

And why do we have this problem? Because of Dogma. No not the movie Dogma, that was good. I mean the pointless rules we all follow for no reason. Let's face it, the idea of the entire world being drowned by a vengeful God is neither pleasent nor practical. I mean come on, the only decent people in the world were Noah, his wife, and there three sons and there son's wives? (Or maybe just Noah and his sons, this is still before feminism remember). And the entire world was destroyed in a flood? This isn't painting a pretty picture for God. This is making God seem like a bastard. If this is God then you religious freaks can have that bastard. And if that's the way things actually are then God can go to hell (or I can go to hell, whatever comes first). I refuse to worship a God who thinks on that level.

So, to tick of the Religious Right and the Bush adminstration, I hearbye declare a new religion, which will be placed above all other religions. And this religion will be called My Religion, and it will dictate that all religions are bogus and that all religions are part of the one real religion in which everything is united into an ultra cool stew of spirituality and imagination. And yes, I stole alot of this from reading Alan Moore's Promethea and yes, I'm very sure that the Sufi's beat me to this, but I'm still declaring the creation of My Religion.

Since I have no declared my own religion I will know be excepting converts. Entry into my religion will be simple, first you find a bunch of stuff in New Age books, science ficion novels and other random stuff and declare that your religion. The key here is not to really believe it, what you are currently believing is just a way to make you a better person, your not suppose to kill anyone about it. (NOTE: Once you add your bits of the religion, it becomes Your Religion, not My Religion. You may call it my religion, but it will no longer be My Religion) Also, have fun with it. Make up really weird gods and stuff like the Giant Spagetti Monster and Naos and make T-shirts of them. If your local chapter of the Pseudo-religious Chirtian Consevative Conspiracy makes some big fuse about something, then go over and give a big rant about your crazy gods that you don't take seriously. Here, I'll show you how it's done.

BROTHERS AND SISTERS! HELLO! I AM THE WRITER! I HAVE COME WITH A MESSAGE FROM HIS DIVINE GROOVINESS NAOS BEN-DAVID, THE TRICKSTER KING AND LORD OVER ALL THE PUBLIC BATHROOMS! (I'm yelling like a crazy person at the moment. This is key, so that they can see how loud and crazy you are. If you have a megaphone that would help to. Keep in mind I am making all of this up as I go, so that way I seem even more weird and crazy). Naos says that the Grand Canyon WASN'T created by EROSION. NOR was it created by NOAH AND HIS FLOOD THINGIE! THE GRAND CANYON WAS CREATED BY NAOS! YES, I say, NAOS created the Grand Canyon.

WHO is NAOS, You say? WHY young girl, NAOS is that guy who you saw busking out in front of some building, but you didn't give him any money because you didn't know it was NAOS. NAOS is that guy who sits at the back of the room and laughs because he is NAOS! Why, I AM NAOS! AND SO ARE YOU! AND YOU! AND YOU! not you. BUT YOU ARE! WE ARE ALL NAOS! except that guy there. I don't know who he is. who are you?

um, frank.

YOU ARE NAOS! GO FORTH AND ROCK MY SON. were was I? Ah, yes. Grand Canyon. NOT ONLY did NAOS create the GRAND CANYON! But he created it, YESTERDAY! Yes, yesterday. And he tricked all of you into thinking that it was here all the time. WHY?!! WHY WOULD NAOS DO THIS?! WHY ELSE, TO IMPRESS HIS GIRLFREIND?! YES, NAOS IS NOT SINGLE! HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND, WHO WOULD BE THE WIFE OF NAOS IF THEY WERE MARRIED! AND HER NAME IS HELEN, AND SHE WILL DESTROY YOUR GOVERNMENT! AND YOUR COUNTRY! AND YOUR GODS! AND YOUR LITTLE DOG TOO! AND THEN ONLY SHE WILL REMAIN, AND NAOS TOO, BECAUSE AS I SAID THEY ARE AN ITEM! AND THEY WILL CONTINUE DOING THIS UNTIL WE GET IT RIGHT! AND THEN WE WILL GET IT WRONG AND THEY WILL HAVE TO START ALL OVER AGAIN, BECAUSE YOU SCREWED IT UP!
WHERE ARE NAOS AND HELEN YOU ASK?

no we didn't

SILENCE! THEY ARE THERE! (point to small bit of dog poo in some grass) IN THE DOG POO!

(this is a refrence to some Taoist and Zen philosophers saying that enlightenment lay in poo. I don't think they were being literal, as much as they were trying to make a point that everything is holy, including your own excriment. I shall continue)

YES. They are in the poo. Do you all see the poo? Everyone look at the poo. Everyone line up and be careful not to step in it. LEAST YOU BE SMITENATED! Yes, see the poo of holiness.

Okay, that's it. I'm stopping know. I believe that I have blown there minds enough. That is all I have to say about that.