When I grow up I want to be Jack Kerouac, Part 1

The big thing is going to be homework for the next few days. I've got to find information for the Aristotle and get my animal rights thing all tidied up. Next to that I've got three movies to watch, Evil Aliens, Easy Rider and Bruce Campbell vs. The Army of Darkness. In between that, I've got an idea for a screenplay that will probably never be made because I have no idea who would want to watch a movie about Jack Kerouac and Neal Cassidy wandering aimlessly across a zombie infested wasteland, and that's just a basic explanation of the idea. The real movie will probubly be much weirder.
I've been thinking about my life resently and I was thinking is that what I really want is to be free from all responsibility. I just want to do my own thing all day. I'd like to get up in the afternoon, have a nice breakfast of pancakes and hashbrowns, take a swim and then work on my writing. There's probubly a woman in there somewhere, since I don't want to be completely lonely and if I'm going to live in isolation then I might as well do it with one very nice woman who is well read and plays Dungeons and Dragons. I realize that this would envolve some responsiblity, for instance I'd have to make a point to write and to have conversations with said woman, but I don't see this as inherently stressful. The logical part of my brain is saying that this would be stressful, because at some point my autism would come up and miss something that's bothering my feminine comrade, like she's feeling sad and I don't know why and it might end up in a fight because I don't know what to do right. Course, since I imagine us on a deserted island we'd probubly resolve it as we are the only two people here, exluding crazy shaman guy who dosn't speak English and throws dead cuttlefish at us when he gets angry, but has some wicked cool tattoos on his face. So what I'm getting at is we'd have to get back together at some point because crazy shaman guy isn't as fun and dosn't know how to play Dungeons and Dragons.
I place to much importance on female companionship, intamite female companionship. Why is that? Why do I believe that finding the right woman will cause complete bliss? All my encounters with real women in an intamite setting have been terrible. When I grow up I want to be Jack Kerouac. Not really Jack Kerouac, I could do without the part of becoming a redneck recluse living in my mother's house and dieing after throwing up in a toliet. I'm thinking wandering about the place aimlessly Kerouac, classic Kerouac. I read or heard something to the effect that Kerouac was good with women. What does he have that I don't have? Well, he's got novels out and isn't autistic. Why do I have this idea of the perfect bliss-giving lover? I think I've hade this idea for most of my life. I've always had this idea of a woman who will protect me from all the frustration of life. Maybe it's some sort of weird Oedipus Complex thing, if so should I try to defete this idea? Is the Oedipus Complex harmful. I mean, I don't actually want to be with my mother, no I want to be with this woman I've had in my mind for lo these many years. I'm I weirding you guys out? I probly am. Spilling my guys like this, all over my blog no less, going on about angelic women who I live in domestic bliss on our own private island in the South Pacific or somewhere in the environs reminisent of a Muslim paradise, short of the seventy-two virgins. Who would want to have inexperienced virgins in paradise anyway? What is this obesssion with virginial purity? Is not virginity just another state of being. Dosn't most everyone stop being a virgin at some point and does it really depict purity? Odds are those kids blowing themselves in the Middle-East are virgins, are they pure?
I'm going to go now before this gets to weird.